neverland

Thursday went well. All the rehearsing and practise paid off in as much as the boy pig entered the trailer, travelled from the field to the car park, was then hitched to the car. He was given a minimal amount of food to entice him in and half a bail of staw. By the time we left home on his last journey he had made himself a bed with the straw and went to sleep.
He was still sleeping when we arrived at the destination. How he slept through all the commotion I do not know. It was like entering a different world......I couldn't help thinking not unlike how Wendy must have felt when Peter Pan took her to Neverland.
We didn't need to flutter our eyelashes to have the trailer reversed for us, (a rehersal we didn't have time for) a gentleman offered before we had a chance to look helpless. Not because we were female but because he had never driven a BMW before!
Another gentleman informed me my paperwork wasn't in order! I assured him that I had filled every scrap that DEFRA had given me. But no, he definately wanted a food chain record form filled in and not the neat pile of food receipts that Jane had so carefully put in date order. The tag (that horrible earing) that identified him was also wrong. I hadn't changed it to our own heard number, it was still sporting Darrens instead. He scribbled a few notes in his  book and showed me I had his telephone number in my file of pig paperwork for future reference.
By this time two men had come to unload our boy. Surprised to see him asleep Jane gently woke him and coached him out of the trailer, 'come on my son' and he followed the men to his journey's end.
I was told by the gentleman whose number I had to go to the office and fill in the relevant forms then I was free to go. By this time there was a bit of a backlog of cattle trucks waiting to unload. The form filling was as easy as pie, a few ticky boxes and vacant looks from the vet as I answered his questions. At least I new which butcher he was going to. I asked if it was always like this or would it be easier the next time. The vet informed me that trading standards were doing a spot visit, how unfortunate I replied, he agreed. He would be delivered to Gary the butcher. (We had visited Gary the previous week had discussed what size joints we required etc. and he was to ring us for collection next week.)
We were moved on, the car was parked infront of the sensor, the electric gates were opening and closing far too many times and we could wear the battery out. We said our goodbyes and left.
The boy had a stress free end, something we had aimed for from the very begining.

My daughter has been very good, googled all the relevant information we need for the next time so she isn't embarrassed by women like us that give women like her a bad name.

ps
I received a phone call from Gary this morning asking if we had taken the pig on Thursday as he hasn't received it yet. The abetoir is closed and I have no way of finding where he is till Monday.